reorganize. restructure. restrengthen

recently I feel my life is going to a mess *again*
my strong-will has been weaken.
my old bad habit is relapsing again
which is being ababil girl again. *big zzzz for myself*
i guess you've known what and who successfully tatter my life.
yes, he is.
hmh a bit hard and embarrassed to confess this.
but yes, til now i still can't escape from his shadow. *my melancholy side mode:on*
although i know it hurts me most but i still have a big damn shit unimportant curiousity *aka kepo* to know more bout it.
til right now, i'll vow to you that i have to strong conviction

that i'll

reorganize and restructure my mind
then
restrengthen my will


to get my normal life back.

i just found new quote, made by own self.
wishing it also could be prevail towards myself:

knowing and realizing are not enough to stop you clinging on what hurts you most. you need a strong-willed to get over about it. and ban your unimportant curiosity to that. at least by staying away from it, you have started to love yourself first!

i do want to love myself!
so i'll start it.
i'll strive to press my unimportant curiosity.
wish me luck.
pray for me.

sorry to be so melancholy right now.
adios!